General Conference

Elder Dube talked about never looking back but looking forward; to me it means don't look back to last year I will only be disappointed. But only look forward to today, like when I walked up stairs like normal or my next therapy session, or tomorrow went I get to go to the last session of general conference. 

The Three Injured Amigos

I realized this week that I can move up on my toes! It doesn't sound like I am really excited but I am! I am just focusing and trying to see results! I realized at church I am in a group of three injured amigos; the first is my mom: she has a bone in her right foot that is crumbling; the second is my brother Ethan, who sprained his right knee as he was practicing football; and my right side is still healing. My mom and Ethan will be healed pretty easy I will take longer! My brother is a goofball.

You will notice the crutches for Ethan, the handlebars for Mom's scooter and then you know about me!

My New Haircut!

My memory of my hair

We weren't in ICU anymore but we couldn't go to the rehab center. I realized that my hair was failing out. I couldn't talk but everyone know that my hair was falling out. That was a tragic experience for me; before everyone got there in the morning I was crying trying to understand why this had to be so hard. I can still look back, and I am weeping as I still don't why it is so hard. From February until September 19, it took me seven months to almost get back all that I had lost!

Good news is that I had a hair cut today, a very very short one. There are pictures of the before and after, plus in the process! 

'Tis a New Month

It is a new month and a new time to reflect on some things.  Chris and I have completed the move into my family's home.  We accomplished it all within two weeks’ time, which was our intent because the fall semester was going to being again at UVU.  Chris received a nice scholarship to essentially cover all expenses for 2 semesters.  It is going to be quite an adjustment to downgrade from our apartment to a studio and a new lifestyle.  At the same time, it presents a great blessing because we can save some money and it will allow me to continue recovery.  All in all, it’s not that bad of a setup.

I have had some difficult nights lately, even to the point of almost screaming in frustration and slamming my left fist down.  It is because I cannot do anything about it.  With my fingers, with my foot, with my inability to speak – if only it was my ability to speak that was impaired I would be more grateful, but it is not.  

Grandma Johnson’s funeral was yesterday.  It was a magnificent ceremony and experience.  Grandma Johnson was so beautiful in her casket with the sacred temple robes on her.  The services were nice, wonderful tributes were given and a Samoan choir participated as they had for my grandpa’s services.  She now is resting by her husband in the Orem cemetery, but her spirit is now reunited with her husband in the spirit world.  Something that I laugh about is that, when getting up to pay respect to her before they closed the casket, I forgot to turn on my Bioness leg device.  So I walked completely under my own power.  I pointed this out to Chris when we got back to our seats!

Here is a Bioness video like I promised.  I am using it more and more each day.  I feel that the devices are helping me – but I cannot get it to work without having my Nike shoes on.  That is frustrating because I want to be able to wear other kinds of shoes!

Quite Sudden and Expected at the Same Time ... We Are Moving

As the title says, we are sad to say that we are moving. We are moving because Chris goes back to school at UVU in the next couple weeks and I'm not healed enough for me to be comfortable by myself. I'm going to continue to heal over the next 8 months (the time Chris has left for his semesters). We are not moving because of the money. It is for me and the people that are taking care of me. So, if in the next two weeks you don't hear from me or Chris, it's because of the move!  We are grateful to all those who have helped in my time of need. We will miss the ward and all the friends we have made. 

P.S. The Bioness video clips are coming soon ... But here is a photo to whet your appetite!

The Bioness Has Arrived

I got my hand Bioness working and had Lumosity placed on my iPad. I am very excited because before you had to get out my laptop and now we get it on my iPad! I learned that you have to give people a break even myself.  My life gets so stressed out because I can't do everything, like hair, because I can't put it into a ponytail. I need a time out too.

I also got my leg Bioness working. It is very slow, because I cannot wear it for a full day yet. I will be fidgeting with my leg as I get used to it. The exciting part is that I can wear different shoes and not the leg brace when I have the Bioness devices on. I am tired of always having to wear my Nike and Sketchers shoes.

I will be posting some videos of the Bioness devices in action soon!

That We Might "Not . . . Shrink" (D&C 19:18)

Cassie and I watched a powerful devotional talk given by Elder David A. Bednar of the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles (found on YouTube on the "Mormon Channel" site). As you all have followed the blog, or have reacquainted yourselves with us in person, you have seen the amazing progress that Cassie exhibits. It is nothing short of miraculous. Our faith has been tested, and I have oft wondered the purpose of these experiences. Cassie has been stalwart in maintaining an optimistic attitude towards the whole recovery process.

At times, we both feel the incredible burden with the many unknowns yet to be, and what we have already endured. I have not always reacted or done things as I ought to have, to show my love and support of my wife as she handles her new lifestyle. She has been gracious in forgiveness when I fall short. In turn, I know that when she feels the overwhelming burden that I have sought to be there to comfort her. 

The beauty of the gospel of Jesus Christ is that we can, through the merits and grace of the Savior, demonstrate the faith to be healed and the ability to submit to the will of God. As Elder Bednar taught these principles, through insight found in a medical example similar enough to our own, Cassie and I gained a better understanding of these things. We would like to share the link with everyone, and send out the invitation to watch. 

http://m.youtube.com/watch?feature=endscreen&NR=1&v=_cpyPUEQlDY&desktop_uri=%2Fwatch%3Fv%3D_cpyPUEQlDY%26NR%3D1%26feature%3Dendscreen

Concert on the Green

There is a new page that bloggers can look at: Perspectives of Close Friends. So far there is only one entry.  My good friend Mady wrote it, and I would like everyone to hear it.  It made me think about my stroke.  Mady has been my best friend.

On Sunday the 14th, I went to the Concert on the Green, an annual event at Mark and Liz Stoddard's house.  Sacred music was the theme for the night.  As a part of that, my stroke was highlighted because I was the guest of honor.  At the beginning of the concert, my husband and I sat inside.  In the intermission, I went outside and said, to the audience, a simple "Thank you."  After that, I went out and greeted the many people that came to show their support.  It was great, because my friends Jena, Sydney, Aubrey, Kaitie and Brooklyn were there.  I got along with my friends easily because they came one-by-one; I didn't have to talk to them all at once.  Those close friends were in a circle and I didn't have a hard time, but outside of that I still have a hard time talking.  I'm grateful for all the donations that still come to me.

It's All Coming Together

By July 2, my blister was almost gone. I was ready for the 4th of July: I got my patriotic wreath and patriotic flowers done to decorate my house.  I went to breakfast up at my family's ward with my husband.  It was quite a good night because we saw, as we drove home, multiple firework displays all the way home.  It was a fun holiday and glad to be with my husband.

The night of Independence Day

My new patriotic shirt!

It's been getting so busy lately! I have been busy with the letters informing you of our fundraiser, held at the Stoddard's house.  I have been so impressed with the generosity of other people.  I want to thank you all.

My husband and I have also been looking into disability insurance.  At first I was turned off by it: the thought that I couldn't go to work and get paid was unacceptable (I realized this in the hospital before I could speak). But I know it's the right thing to do, not leaving my husband to pay for every thing. And we have friends helping us survive.

A Letter for Your Friends

Blog and Facebook group update!  There are two new files uploaded to the Facebook group's file page.  They are both the same thing, just one in DOCX format and the other in PDF format.  It is a letter that you can use, possibly personalized, to send to those who you might think might appreciate a hard copy of information concerning Cassandra's progress and the intentions of the fundraiser.

We have already been quite humbled with the outpouring of love, whether it be through donations or just the comfort and strength necessary for Cassie and I to make it through this difficult challenge.  We love you all and appreciate you so much.